Today, I gave up social media for awhile. Why? I had to search for something good, kind, and lovely. The world seems so full of hate and hopelessness and I have had enough. I may not be able to change the world on social media but I certainly have the power to take measures to keep it from changing me.
Enough of that soapbox but I hope you see the connection. One of my New Year's "resolutions" was to give effort toward two meaningful friendships this year. My children are grown. I am married to my best friend and am with him almost 24/7 since we work in the same building. But I find myself lacking true female companionship so this new book by Shaunti Feldhahn caught my eye immediately. It may not have been the purpose for which she wrote The Kindness Challenge but it has been a number of years since I felt I had the time to cultivate relationships with other women so thought it the perfect place to begin. The one thing that struck me right off was Feldhahn's showing me how kindness didn't just matter and make a difference to those I wanted to improve a relationship with but it also change me.
Feldhahn's down to earth way to saying thing and her writing style make this an easy read in a day but the challenges and ideas will remain with you much, much longer. She is quick to point out how I may be messing up my relationships with others and gives easy to put into practice ideas/strategies for improving your relationship with your spouse and others. Her ideas are more than just being nice, it is about being kind. I recently saw a commercial or quote about nice being just a simple, perhaps one-time thing you do. Kindness is more about who you are as a person. Feldhahn brings that straight home.
It seems as if, with my husband, I have been on track with the first of Feldhahn's three step process but can always use a reminder to "never say anything negative to or about another person....ever". That is a practice I have tried to incorporate into my entire marriage. I never wanted anyone else to think anything other than that my husband was "perfect"--at least not from my mouth. Her second suggestion--find something you can genuinely praise and appreciate in that person and make certain they are aware of it. Third--do an act of kindness for the person. While these all seem like simple steps, Feldhahn suggests we're not quite as good at being kind in this way as we may think we are and provides simple strategies that you can incorporate into your day and relationships. If taken to heart, this book WILL change your relationships...guaranteed.
I did receive this book free from the publisher in exchange for an honest review and was in no way obligated to write a positive one. Two thumbs up to Shaunti Feldhahn for her new release, The Kindness Challenge: Thirty Days to Improve Any Relationship.
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